Lately, I’ve been depressed and overwhelmed, and not doing a whole heck of a lot. I can’t seem to muster the energy to do much more than play with my son, spend time with my wife, cry, whine, and mope. I’m even finding it difficult to edit our book or futz about in Triiibes, both of which I’m very excited about… in theory.
Yesterday, I got teary and frustrated about this situation, so Pace and I talked about it. She said I’ve been acting small – saying “I can’t” a lot, and getting easily discouraged and frustrated.
She’s exactly right.
I’ve embiggened myself physically; I’m getting up and exercising 20 minutes a day, 6 days a week and I’ve made radical changes to how and what I eat, and that’s it. That’s all I’ve got. I’m physically weary a lot of the time, covered with minor but irritating aches and sorenesses. I’m dealing with hunger and random wacky cravings as my body detoxes and adjusts to the lack of crap we’re used to getting.
It seems as though I have a fixed amount of big available, and right now, mine’s going to my physical goals – I’m focusing on my physical state and am thusly unable to focus on anything else. But come on, people don’t quit their jobs to lose weight! How do other people do this on top of a normal life? How can I continue to achieve my very important goals without sacrificing the rest of everything?
I’m not sure yet, but I’m sure I can figure it out. By the gods, I have a lot to do and the clock’s a-ticking.