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Here’s a fun story of learning about myself and separating out my own thoughts and beliefs from the tapes in my head (Week 8 of 52 Weeks to Awesome). You get it in both audio and text format, but the audio is much funnier because we burst out laughing umpteen times a minute. (:

Pace and Kyeli get introspective and silly about caffeine (MP3 audio, 6:07)

Kyeli: When you need caffeine, why do you ask me to hand you half a caffeine pill and ask you to take it? Why don’t you just get it and take it yourself?

Pace: I’m working on that, but I feel a lot of resistance to it. Until I get better at doing it myself, I appreciate your help.

Kyeli: Do you know why you feel resistance to doing it on your own?

Pace: Hmm. No, I don’t know. It’s weird, because I have no problem drinking coffee, but taking caffeine in pill form feels bad for some reason.

Kyeli: What about caffeinated soap?

Pace: I don’t know. That’s just weird.

Kyeli: So, a caffeine pill is bad if you take it on your own, but it’s okay if I hand it to you and say, “Here, take this”?

Pace: Yeah. It’s like… pills are okay if a doctor tells you to take them, but maybe I picked up a taboo against self-medication? That it’s bad to alter your consciousness for non-health-related reasons? That may explain some of my weirdness about drinking, too.

Kyeli: But I’m not a doctor, so why does it still count?

Pace: *announcer voice* She’s a REAL DOCTOR!

Kyeli: *giggles*

Pace: *announcer voice* And she loves HICKORY SMOKED HORSE BUTTHOLES!

Kyeli: *giggles* But seriously, what if some random dude on the street handed you a caffeine pill and said, “Here, take this?”

Pace: No, that wouldn’t count.

Kyeli: What if you got out a caffeine pill, handed it to me and asked me to ask you to take it, and then I asked you to take it?

Pace: Yeah, that would totally work.

Kyeli: *baffles*

Pace: Maybe it’s like… an authority figure? No, because a cop wouldn’t count. A caretaker. That’s it. If a caretaker tells you to take a pill, it’s okay. Otherwise, it’s not.

Kyeli: That makes sense that you would pick that up. But why is it okay to drink coffee? It has just as much caffeine as the pill, and yet you don’t have resistance to drinking it without me saying, “Hey Pace, drink this coffee.”

Pace: Hmm, I guess there’s a special exception for drinks. I would have a lot more resistance to an alcohol pill than I would to an alcoholic drink.

Kyeli: What about… what’s that caffeinated water called? Water Joe? Is that okay?

Pace: Yeah, that’s fine.

Kyeli: So what if you crushed up half a caffeine pill and dissolved it in a glass of water? It’s exactly the same as Water Joe. How’s that?

Pace: Oh no, that’s totally not okay.

Pace and Kyeli: *burst out laughing*

Pace: I guess the difference is that with Water Joe, some faceless, nameless person at the Water Joe factory put it in a bottle, and that kind of gives it the Societal Seal of Approval. “It is okay to drink this!” But doing it on my own doesn’t get the seal of approval, because I don’t have that authority.

Kyeli: But if you worked at the Water Joe factory, you would?

Pace: No, no, I’d have to be in charge of the factory.

Kyeli: So if you were in charge of the Water Joe factory, you could crush up a caffeine pill, dissolve it in your glass of water, and drink it?

Pace: No! I’d have to do it the official way and push the buttons in the factory. I’d have to drink from an official Water Joe bottle if I want the Seal of Approval.

Kyeli: *giggle* So… coffee has the Societal Seal of Approval because it’s a generally accepted thing that people drink. And so does Water Joe. But Water Joe Moonshine doesn’t?

Pace: Exactly.

Kyeli: Of all people, you’re the last one I’d expect to obsess over the Societal Seal of Approval.

Pace: *shrug* I guess I just picked up this tape when I was younger, and it’s still running.

Kyeli: Well, now that you know it’s just a tape, is your resistance still there?

Pace: *checks* Yup, still there. Maybe a little weaker, but still there. Still, knowing about it helps a lot. Thanks, peachberry.

Kyeli: Any time, babe.